F.E.A.R.

Fuck Everything And Run.



Hahaha...ironic because that was definitely the one singular thought pulsating through my brain last night while I was under siege by Dracula.


What!??!! It's true. He was hiding in my closet. Swear to God.


O.o


I don't know if you know this about me, but I'm a pussy, not only do I have one, I AM one. Well, under one condition...the windows have been blackened by the fall midnight. O.o I'm like a vampire...in reverse. Vicious, biting and snarky by day (maybe I'm a teenage vamp...), petrified whimp at night. During the daylight hours, this nocturnal beast is ready and rearing to take on some seriously terrifying shit. Read some mystery, horror, whatever dude. Staring in the moonlit mirror and reciting my Bloody Marys, contacting the spirits of the dead with my handy dandy oujii board, racing around in the woods decorated like something out of the Blair Witch Project?? Bring it on bitch. BRING IT ON!!! I am a jaguaress baby. A damned melanistic jaguaress. Rawr! I don't only thrive in the nighttime hours, I am on the prowl. A lean, mean, fighting machine, taking down everything and anything in my path, a weapon of the dark.

Hahahaha, you've got to be shitting me.

I have no idea why I'm so active at night and so exhausted during the day (hence said bitchiness...). I would like to think I'm a tough ass, but last night so TOTALLY proved me wrong. Horrifically wrong. O.o

I decided I was brave enough (after everyone had fallen asleep in the household, mind you) to read Dracula before retiring for the evening...and ended up curled in the fetal position, head under covers, trembling in fear clutching a pen light and the stuffed moose my boyfriend bought me for Christmas two years ago. Twitching at the slightest noise. Trying to disappear into the mattress. To terrified to move, but to afraid not to run. Fighting the fight or flight instincts like a mad man. Trapped between the moonlight shining through my massive window and the largeness of my double-doored closet housing the red-eyed, sharped toothed vampyre. Readjusting my coffee mug for easier access so as to attack the encroaching army of Dracula clones...

Yeah, needless to say I didn't sleep a wink. You wanna know the most pathetic part??

I read two pages. O.o It started with "Left Munich at 8.35 p.p. on 1st May, arriving at Vienna early next morning; should have arrived at 6.46, but train was an hour late." and ended with "I trust that your journey from London has been a happy one, and that you will enjoy your stay in my beautiful land./Your friend,?DRACULA."

I know, what a scaredy-cat. UGH.