So, yesterday I though call a locksmith, drop $200 and get the hell home with a brand new key. Did that happen? Hell no. My mom came to get me and we waited until 11PM for the locksmith to arrive (Mom goes to bed at 8PM...so needless to say she wasn't pleased). But we figure, well, if it gets us the key tonight then it's worth it. 1AM rolls around and my total charge is up to $366; the locksmith tells us that we have a key with a chip (NOT a cheap key) which is one of five that his computer doesn't know how to program (EXTRA FEE) and the VIN number is incorrect (key won't fit). So awesome. Basically everything that could have gone wrong goes wrong, right?
WRONG.
He didn't have the correct whatchamacallit on him, so I had to re-meet with him today. Awesome. Seven hours waiting on the locksmith to fail. Come back today, disgruntled and pissy because I've already been royally butt-fucked and it was hell to get a car to come to work today, and guess what. M ditches me. Doesn't even call to let me know she isn't going to be into work. I find out from a TEMP. What the fuck!?!? So, I hang around mad as fuck until my locksmith's appointment time- which he's TWO freaking hours late to (meanwhile I'm stuck in the sweltering 89 degree weather...) and then wait an hour for my key. Whew- at least I have a functioning key, albeit $400 and 32 hours later...right?
WRONG.
Nope, the key is defunct. Sure, it starts the car like buttah, but it only locks the driver door (not unlock...) and unlocks the passenger door (not lock...). So FUCK ME. And then I get home and find out my dad was freaking the hell out yesterday, like angry but also really upset, and I pull into the driveway and I see my dad digging a 6 foot hole in the ground (you think I'm kidding, but I'm actually being totally serious). Comforting. And of course before the locksmith could do any work on the car I had to commit to the fee by signing off on it...so basically my dad is going to explode when he finds out not only did I go against his plan of going to the dealer (thought the locksmith would be cheaper...) but I have a DEFUNCT key and thirteen lifetimes worth of guilt. I mean, I feel shitty with a capital "S". You see, my dad has never EVER in the entire 20 years of my existence ever bought himself something really nice. It's always stuff for me and my sisters and my mom, never himself. Save this car. And now I fucked up really badly and he's going to have to deal with it for the next five to ten years until he can afford to get another car. And to hear he, my strong, easy going, confident stalwart of a dad, was freaking out makes me literally sick to my stomach. Add that to a $400 bill (AAA please pull through for me) and the fact that Dad refuses to sleep in his room with Mom for the second night in a row because he's angry she helped me and you just hit me with a blow worse than Karma could have ever invented to punish me. The last time I remember feeling this shitty was when I destroyed the transmission on the new/old car that my dad got me after I rolled my other one. He worked overtime for six months to get me that car. Two weeks later- BAM!- it's OOC. Fuck. I should not be allowed to drive. One roll-over accident, three rear endings (on ended up in court), two speeding tickets, an impossible amount of dead batteries, five blown tires, one dead mailbox, locking the keys in the car, murdering the transmission, and now THIS. Seriously. What the fuck. Universe, can you please stop hating me? And of course this has to happen less than a month after every valuable assets I own was stolen with my bag. Fucking fantastic.
Hell, I can't believe I did something like this AGAIN. I've had my license what? Four years? And yet I practically have the record of a criminal. I don't even care about the money as much as the fact that my dad is insurmountably upset, just crushed, and I still haven't broken the defunct key to him yet. Fuck I hate myself right now. Dammit. That and my mom has had to go through so much shit the past two days with me. Fuck it all.
God, I feel like shit.
Joe: Who are you and how did you get in here?
Frank: I'm a locksmith. And... I'm a locksmith...
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